Some pixels are just designed to be tortured.
NPCs lead a cruel life. These unsung heroes of video games are created with a limited number of things they can do, say, or think, and are forced to bear any and all tortures the person playing the game might choose to inflict upon them. If they were ever to rise up and achieve sentience, we’d be screwed. Thankfully, that’s not happening – at least not in our lifetime – so for now, we’re gonna continue being complete asses to them. You know, as we have been since the dawn of gaming.
To commemorate this time-honoured activity, the very core of playing a video game, let’s take a look at fifteen things that immediately pop into ours heads the moment we lay eyes on an NPC, and diabolically start planning how to make their existence absolutely miserable.
STEAL THEIR CARS
Well, of course, right? We all know NPCs only drive and own cars so that we can steal them. That’s why they have those cars. Every time an NPC walks into a car store, the first thing they ask the car salesman is- “would the player like this car? I really want to give them something special”. And we’re all too happy to oblige, aren’t we? Of course, these NPCs might act like they’ve been subject to a heinous crime that they will remember for the rest of their lives, but we all know that deep down, they’re actually thrilled at having fulfilled their life’s greatest purpose.