LUIGI IS PLAYABLE IN SUPER MARIO 64
Every so often, hardcore Super Mario 64 fans abruptly wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in cold sweats, their hearts beating furiously, fleeting images flashing before their eyes, memories of a tortured past tormenting them even in their sleep, as an old message, seared into their brains, claws its way back up again to momentarily remind them of backbreaking yet futile attempts to achieve something that simply could not be achieved. The message? L Is Real 2401. What is this message, though? All the non-believers just shrug at it and say, “doesn’t look like anything to me”. Many claim that it’s just yet another case of some people unnecessarily overthinking things. But true Super Mario fans know- the star statue inside of a fountain in the Peach’s Castle hub world refers to the presence of a playable Luigi in the game.
The plaque on the statue reads “L Is Real 2101” (though non-believers claim it simply reads “Eternal Star”). Obviously, it is alluding to the fact that Luigi is playable in the game, and that the star statue is somehow the key to unlocking that. So far, all attempts, even the most bizarre (like playing the game with a green controller, don’t ask) have been unsuccessful. It’s been over twenty years. But we haven’t given up. We will never give up. We know Luigi is out there somewhere, waiting for us to find him and control him as a playable character and give him the attention he craves, the attention the masses give to his brother so readily. We will find you, Luigi. One day, we will find you.
